2005-02-01 grumpy

The Lumpy, Grumpy, Down-in-the-Dumpy-ness of it All

whoa! holy seasonal crankitude, Batman! The Handsome Guy and I have been suffering from Seasonal Affective Disorder (S.A.D), I'm certain of it. It's been Snark City round these parts lately. Which is not entirely without its charms.

Witness this scene Saturday morning: Jack comes grumping down the stairs balancing about seven glasses half-full of Tangerine and Grapefruit flavored Crystal Lite (my beverage of choice these days.) Passing me on the way to the kitchen, he fixes me with a withering stare and says "you know, I don't think you like to drink Crystal Lite as much as you like to pour Crystal Lite."

Later there was further discussion about how my standard method of operation in the kitchen features a baffling ability to use every spoon in the drawer and leave them stuck to the countertop. I tried to defend myself by saying that spoons are like surgical instruments.You have to have them laid out and at the ready at all times. He's just not buying it.

The dog has also been afflicted with S.A.D. This does not make her cranky so much as restless. She is bored, bored, bored and uses every available minute of the day (those which are not devoted to wading thru snowbanks, searching for bunny poo, chewing sticks, eating or sleeping) to let me know that my only function in life is to entertain her. She becomes very insistent, poking me repeatedly with her nose when I'm at the computer, boosting me in the butt if I'm otherwise engaged in tooth brushing, dressing, laundry, cooking, whatever... hauling out every single toy she owns out of her basket to drop expectantly at my feet. Sighing and whinging and fixing me steadily, imploring me, with her sad eyes.

It's all getting rather old. I'm ready for spring. I've grown weary of the cold, the wind, the constant removal of ice balls from betwixt my dog's webbed retriever toes, the scrapping down of the car, the windshield always smeared with grime and shmutz despite constant spritzing with wiper fluid. The odd, musty smell of wet winter woollies, the constant hat head. The (say it with me, Otter!) MONOLITHIC TRUDGE of winter.

Not helping the crankitude is the fact that I'm scheduled for week three at the dentist's office this afternoon. Yippeee. last week i had double root canal. Yeah, big fun. Today he finishes the job. Yee haw.

All I have to say is that groundhog better see his stinkin' shadow or else.... Hmmm. Mayhaps the forecast for Furious was not as innaccurate as first thought, just delayed a few days.


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